Feeling Heavy and Serious Lately? Let the Child in You Lead You Back to Joy

Hello there, friend.

You know that moment in the middle of a full week when you catch yourself in the mirror and your face looks so serious? Jaw set. Shoulders up by your ears. Like the whole day is a test you have to pass.

And then, maybe on the walk to the car, you see a little kid take a running leap into a pile of November leaves. Pure abandon. Leaves everywhere. A laugh that comes from the belly.

Something in you remembers. Oh yeah. I used to live like that.

Okay, here’s the thing. That kid is still in you. Today I want to walk you back to them.

Joy Was Your First Language

This essay grew from an episode of the Start Early Today podcast, Return To Joy. The episode notes carry one line that sums it all up. Through the eyes of a child everything is wonderful.

Think about the places you loved as a kid. The park. The backyard. The woods behind a friend’s house. Hopscotch, hide and seek, a camping trip with family.

In that episode I wrote that as children, nature was often the background of our most cherished memories. And that through the eyes of a child there’s this vast openness and acceptance and curiosity.

That openness was your first language. You spoke it fluently before you learned a single rule.

But trailing clouds of glory do we come
From God, who is our home

William Wordsworth, Ode, Intimations of Immortality from Recollections of Early Childhood, stanza V, Poems in Two Volumes (1807)

I love that image. You came in trailing glory. Wordsworth goes on to say that heaven lies about us in our infancy. Around us. Close. And that glory is still trailing along behind you today.

Apply it today. Name one thing you loved doing at age seven and give it five minutes this week.

What did joy feel like in your body back then?

Happiness Shows Up the Moment You Loosen Your Grip

A while back I wrote an essay called The secret location of happiness. The subtitle says it all. Happiness is found in the abandonment of the need for it.

That’s the funny paradox. The tighter we hold the plan, the further away joy seems to sit. The moment we open our hands, it lands right in them.

In that same piece I wrote, Today may we be reminded to let go of the need for things to be a certain way.

Kids are masters at this. The game changes every five minutes and they roll with it. The fort becomes a ship. The ship becomes a castle. Everyone keeps playing.

So instead of asking, how do I make today go exactly right, try asking, how can I enjoy today as it unfolds?

Apply it today. Pick one plan you’re gripping and hold it a little looser. Let the day surprise you once.

The Same Small Thing Can Delight You Again and Again

Have you ever watched a kid ask for the same story for the hundredth time? Or beg you to spin them around again, and again, and again?

Grownups tend to read that as repetition. Kids read it as delight.

It is possible that God says every morning, “Do it again” to the sun; and every evening, “Do it again” to the moon.

G. K. Chesterton, Orthodoxy, Chapter IV, The Ethics of Elfland (1908)

Oof, I love this one. Imagine the sunrise as an encore. Imagine your morning coffee, your walk, your favorite song, all as something the universe gets a kick out of repeating.

Your ordinary routine is full of tiny encores waiting for you to notice them.

Apply it today. Choose one daily ritual and do it like it’s your favorite song. Slow. Fully. Smiling.

Heaviness Is Real, and Lightness Is Still Within Reach

Real talk. Some seasons are heavy. Bills, deadlines, people you love going through hard things. Some mornings you wake up already tired.

Maybe you’ve had stretches where joy felt like something for other people. Something you’d get to later, once everything settled.

Here’s the line from that episode I’d love for you to borrow. Today I choose to bask in the small joys of life.

Choose. That’s the whole move. Joy is a choice you get to make while life is still messy.

I wrote about this in What If Happiness Is Already Here? too. What if it’s unconditional, woven into this very moment?

You get to hold both. The weight is real, and so is the laughter. You can carry a heavy week and still giggle at a dog chasing its tail.

Apply it today. When the day feels heavy, find one small joy within arm’s reach and give it your full attention for one minute.

The Whole Party Is Already Here

In an essay called Advanced Techniques for Basic Joy, I wrote about a blanket spread beneath tall pine trees on a Saturday afternoon. Friends and family laughing over homemade coconut lime popsicles. Agnes, my sister’s pitbull terrier, joyfully chasing a squirrel up a tree.

And I wrote, this moment contains everything we’ve been seeking in our endless pursuit of more.

That’s the secret kids already know. The good stuff is already here. Sunlight through branches. Sticky fingers. A dog with a mission.

The world is so full of a number of things,
I’m sure we should all be as happy as kings.

Robert Louis Stevenson, Happy Thought, A Child’s Garden of Verses (1885)

Two lines. A whole philosophy. The world is full, so you get to be full of happiness too.

Apply it today. Count ten good things around you right now, out loud if you like, the sillier the better.

What’s already here that you’ve been walking past?

Play Is How the Heart Says Yes

In the episode notes I wrote that this universe is being made out of fun and spontaneity. I still believe that with my whole chest.

Play is a way of saying yes to life. Yes to this moment. Yes to whatever comes next.

When you play, you stop performing and start participating. You become curious again. And curiosity is where every good thing in your life began.

It also changes how you see yourself, which changes everything. I wrote more about that in The Way You See Yourself Is Quietly Writing Your Whole Life.

Apply it today. Do one thing purely because it’s fun. Doodle, dance in the kitchen, skip a few steps on the sidewalk.

Through the Eyes of a Child, Everything Is Wonderful

Let’s zoom out for a second.

You arrived here trailing clouds of glory. Curious. Wide open. Ready to be delighted by a puddle or a pinecone.

All the years since then have given you so much. Wisdom. Strength. People you love. And that kid is still right there, ready to play whenever you are.

So the next time you catch your serious face in the mirror, picture that kid leaping into the leaves. Then go find your own pile.

Where in your life is joy waving at you right now, waiting for you to come play?

Try This Today

1. Unclench. Drop your shoulders, soften your jaw, and smile at the day.
2. Notice one encore. Find one daily ritual and enjoy it like the first time.
3. Loosen one plan. Let one part of today unfold its own way.
4. Play for five minutes. Do something silly purely for the fun of it.
5. Share the joy. Invite someone you love to play with you, and laugh together.

Start today. Start early. Start with one leap into the leaves.

Keep Going

• When the Week Feels Small, Step Into Wonder and Feel How Wide You Are
• You Get to Live in the Feeling Before the Thing Is Here
• Put On the Mask Tonight and Meet Your Original Face
• Sing Before the Sun Comes Up, Rabindranath Tagore on Faith, Light and Love

This essay grew from the podcast episode Return To Joy. Give it a listen, and follow Start Early Today on Spotify for a little light every morning.

For further reading, sit with The secret location of happiness and Advanced Techniques for Basic Joy on Make Pure Thy Heart.

Want a calm, intentional start every day? Hold Until Sunrise is our little app for mornings that matter.

For a little goodness in your inbox every Sunday, join us here.

With love, Paolo

Sources

• Paolo Peralta, Return To Joy, Start Early Today podcast, Spotify, with notes on Substack
• Paolo Peralta, The secret location of happiness, Make Pure Thy Heart
• Paolo Peralta, Advanced Techniques for Basic Joy, Make Pure Thy Heart
• Paolo Peralta, What If Happiness Is Already Here?, Make Pure Thy Heart
• William Wordsworth, Ode, Intimations of Immortality from Recollections of Early Childhood, stanza V, Wikisource
• G. K. Chesterton, Orthodoxy, Chapter IV, The Ethics of Elfland, Wikisource
• Robert Louis Stevenson, Happy Thought, A Child’s Garden of Verses, Wikisource